Don’t Try

Charles Bukowski

“Find what you love and let it kill you…”

Welcome back to another Evolve Already letter with fact filled stories! We only had 3 new subs this week which is well below average. Usually I have 5-7 which is cool but there really wasn’t a clear topic this month, plus I didn’t promote it — so fair enough!

Anyway I’ll make sure we have new mates and stranger things next week. As always, the deeper, the better. No fragile shallow shit here. I’m not scared to say fuck and in case you missed it, below is the only email I sent last week:


Subject: Don’t try

At some point you’ve been asked what your favorite color was, and you answered easily…

…probably with blue.

(pink is more popular with chicks)

The second favorites are red and green, followed by orange, brown and purple. Nobody likes yellow. But I don’t care what your “fav color” is right now. I find it more strange that you feel anything for a damn color.

You didn’t have to “try” to come up with the “right” answer. If you ask some kid their “favorite color” you’ll notice they wait for an answer to hit them, rather than try to come up with one.

They don’t try.

The late great Charles Bukowski was so sure this was the secret to his success, that he chose to have just two simple words written on his tombstone:

Don’t try.

This laid-back alcoholic writer had explained the phrase earlier in some 1963 letter to John William Corrington:

“Somebody at one of these places asked me: ‘What do you do? How do you write, create?’ You don’t, I told them. You don’t try. That’s very important: not to try, either for Cadillacs, creation or immortality. You wait, and if nothing happens, you wait some more.”

Sounds counterintuitive – but it isn’t.

Although he was talking about creating and writing, this lesson works on so many levels that it applies (almost) across the board: from your career or business to your relationships or even quitting an addiction forever.


Cool email but not so promotional because, I suppose, it didn’t exactly explain what this letter was about.

I’ll tell you what I’m mansplaining today:

“Don’t Try”

Let’s kick it off karate style…

…most folks learning karate via their “apprenticeship” are self-conscious of every move. They over-think shit. They lack the ability to just do what needs to be done. They cannot simply execute maneuvers of defense, or offense.

So they try to learn.

With any sport (or anything, really) as you progress and slowly build up years of experience, you no longer have a need to “think” about stuff before executing said stuff.

Shit just happens.

Defense and offense become automatic reflexes because after so many hours of repetition, you internalize them.
Like a soccer goalie trying to stop a goal.

When the ball is kicked (in a penalty shot) the goalie doesn’t have time to think. They must dive before they know where the ball is going. If they wait to see which way the ball goes, it’s too late.

That’s why they often dive the wrong way.

There is zero time for thought.

Brains ain’t got time for that! So they wait until the last moment possible, and then they give in to their reflexes and pray they jump the right way.

It isn’t all prayers, though.

They take cues from the kicker.

Like how they run up to the ball.

Which leg moves in which way.

The goalie takes all this into consideration and then chooses which way to jump before the ball is even kicked.

As I said, there is zero time for thought.

When you get good at this, the memory is not just stored in your brain. It is also stored in your muscle memory. Together this type or reaction is known as a reflex.

It is their reflexes that must be internalized.

The player that internalizes the most, wins.

Tennis is another great example.

Almost always, it is the player who spends more hours practicing who wins the cup. Number one in the world is almost always the person who spends the most time playing tennis. In tennis there is no time to think when returning a serve. It is a battle of internalized reflexes.

Not from thought.

You are simply being and doing…

What else are you going to do?

This is how this lesson affects everything.

Just as nature is abundant, so are you.

Once you have taken care of yourself, and you are no longer struggling for air, money, health, relationships, food, shelter (or whatever else your grubby hands need) then the caring and loving starts to flow outwards.

You naturally begin helping other people (and here’s the kicker) not because you are trying to become something you are not. Not because you are showing off your money, or your body, or your social media presence. Not even because you care. I mean you probably do care, but that’s not the reason you take action.

You just do.

Humans who are above esteem level naturally give.

We are one of the most social species on this planet, and it shows. You can test it. Healthy humans will naturally give to other humans in need. If they don’t, it is usually because they are trying to be something they are not, or they themselves are lacking.

Another quote attributed to Charles Bukowski is this:

“Find what you love and let it kill you.”

But what do you love?

What the hell is your thing?

To truly do “your thing” you need to NOT be trying to do anything else, or anyone else’s thing. To be you, you must NOT try to be anyone else.

This whole “trying” shit isn’t necessarily serving you.

To be free from “trying” and to begin “doing” the trick is to notice that you have two modes in life. As we know from Rex VS Albert, you have survival mode and you have growth mode. One is dominated entirely by Rex playing around, the other allows Albert to make plans.

Jeff Bezos (owner of Amazon) lives by this doctrine:

“We can’t be in survival mode. We have to be in growth mode”

Many people are in survival mode, and many people who have access to growth mode remain in survival mode.

They reek of desperation.

They are stuck “trying” to learn how to be the person they think they should be. Or want to be. They find certain role models and try to emulate them, but it never works out because…

…why the hell would it?

You cannot try to be someone you are not. You must be you because being yourself has zero competition.

Who else can be you but you?

Until Next Week,

Tristan Weatherburn
https://tristanweatherburn.com

Get monthly brain training to help you quit dumb shit, get shit done, and change the human you are being, with Evolve Already.


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