The biggest threat to all your relationships, is an argument.
Something most folks don’t know is you can easily avoid them. Disagreements are fine (and normal) because it’d be weird if you never disagreed. But arguments are unnecessary. Arguments only appear when you are both emotionally attached to the topic you are discussing.
If you carry this feeling through time (AKA hold a grudge) that’s called trauma – and it seems pretty sad to give yourself trauma over a damn conversation (lol) I mean, you should be able to discuss money, health, religion or politics – peacefully – with any other human you want.
But you can’t.
The reason you can’t is because most humans have emotional attachments to these topics.
So if you want to have better relations with almost every other human you meet…
…don’t be that dude.
Be the person that can talk about anything, openly, honestly, and unemotionally, because you know damn well it is okay to disagree. If you can consistently leave emotion out of it, you will leave the other person little choice but to abandon their emotion and do exactly the same thing.
Let the little guys argue.
Keep Reality Real,
Cynthia replied to my ‘avoid arguments’ email from above:
“Sorry but this is a gross over simplification of conflict at a time where we must stand up to gross injustice. Please don’t tell me I need to keep emotion out of it when, as just one small example, we have neighbors (here in the US) proudly supporting an ignorant fascist who, among other things, locks little kids up in cages at the border. When I overhear these people talking MAGA, I will confront them every single time. This detached stance you’re promoting is total BS.
Sent from my iPhone, invented by the son of a Syrian immigrant.”
Cynthia missed my point.
Emotions are normal.
Disagreements are useful.
Mixing the two is called an argument…
…and arguments never solve anything. I agree that it can be difficult, but I stand by what I say. If you have neighbors supporting something you don’t agree with, confront ‘em.
It’s cool you stand up to gross injustice.
My point is, the more emotional you are while confronting these people (or any other human) the less influential you’ll be. That’s just how reality is. If you want actual results, it is the person that stays calm and assertive that always has the advantage.
Did my original ’emotional’ email above go too far?
You be the judge.
Keep Reality Real,
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